The Undefeated, The Unconquerable

I was reading an article written about very bright very driven young students in South East Asia in the magazine Asian Geographic Read. Part of the article ia about a straight-A Singaporean student Antariksh Mahajan who is 18 and studying at Raffles Institution Singapore. An all rounder with a string of notable achievements Mahajan stated his favourite quote as " I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul".

The quote is from the poem Invictus by the English poet William Ernest Henley (1849-1903). Invictus is Latin for undefeated or unconquerable. I am very fond of that poem myself even though some parts are difficult to fathom. I strongly feel that no matter what life or fate or anyone throws at you, they will not succeed in dampening your spirit or your resolve, because you yourself holds the key to your success. It is about taking full responsibility about one's life and it is also about intense focus, hard work, drive and motivation in pursuing your dreams and passions. It is also about making choices in life, for that is what life is really all about.

INVICTUS
( The Unconquerable Soul)

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

William Ernest Henley contracted tuberculosis when he was seven. At seventeen one of his leg had to be amputated to stop the progress of the disease. In Victorian time tuberculosis was deadly and Henley had to fight the disease all his life. Despite the amputation he managed to lead a normal with one foot intact until his death at the age of 53. The poem was written when he was recovering from surgery in the infirmary. That period of his life, coupled with the reality of an impoverished childhood, plays a major role in the meaning behind the poem.

Gollum LOTR (aka Siti Gollum)

About a year ago, me and my gang in CIAST came across a tiny tortoise-shell kitten who was very shy with humans. The tortoise-shell is a very attractive colour and Gollum was very cute at that time that we just couldn't resist cuddling and petting her and slowly she lost her shyness and became very attached to me and my friends Darling and Dear. I nicknamed her Gollum because I thought she was a boy and she looked a bit like the Gollum or Smeagol creature of  the Lord of the Ring Trilogy movies. No offence Gollum dearest, the creature in the movie is obsessed with the ring and quite horrible, but you were adorable and you melted our hearts with your gentleness and playfulness during those early months.

Beside feeding him, I get Gollum vaccinated and later on she was spayed. Gollum had to stay almost three weeks at the vet because immediately after the surgery she had some cat flu. I was worried but our girl got through her flu and came back to CIAST. She thrived after the surgery and became chubbier and lovelier
and we dotted on her even more. During that time I sometimes came to CIAST on Saturdays or Sundays because I just couldn't bear the thought that Gollum and some of the other CIAST cats would be hungry for the weekends. By then Gollum was people-friendly,  healthy, happy and a bit of an attention seeker.

A heavy shadow passes over me when I heard there was a move to get MBSA to destroy all CIAST cats. What will happen to our beloved Gollumn? I thought about rehoming her with Nizam's help or otherwise sending her to any of the animal sanctuaries around KL (PAWS being the nearest). I couldn't help feeling very sad about it because I do not know the person who will be Gollum's master or mistress. Will that person be kind to her?

God Almighty is great for then Darling decided to adopt Gollum even though she already had two of her own, the handsome Labi and Ibu. Darling had a few months back lost her kitten Labi who was run over by a car in front of her home and she said she originally had three and may be she was meant to have three cats. I was very very happy that Gollum will be with Darling and En. Amir but how will Labi and Ibu receive Gollum? Things turned well in the end because Labi was very taken with Gollum and Ibu was okay with her.

That was a few months back. Now Gollum is happy and healthy with her new family. Thank you Mak Andak and Uncle Amir for the caring individuals that you both are in adopting Gollum. That was one of the many good things that happened to me in 2013. Wish you many many many happy and prosperous years with Gollum, Labi and Ibu!

Always taking opportunity to play with us

The cute young lady

The adorable girl

On Being Happy .........

One of my weaknesses is that I am a worrier (just to quote the gorgeous Edward Cullen from Twilight) and I have a tendency to mentally exaggerate simple problems I have. Brought up by disciplinarian adopted parents I tend to like my life to be in an orderly manner always and I mentally freaked out if things get disrupted from their routine. That happened quite frequently during my teenage years. Looking back, I would say I that had a very stressful childhood and teenage years. All the quarrels, the bitterness and sadness of my adopted parents unhappy marriage and later their divorce, definitely left a permanent scar on my psyche. Those years were not necessarily bad, I had learnt many things from them and it had shaped what I am today. I moved on from all those chaos and turmoil.

Just to share a positive quote and an affirmation that I loved. The third photo is just added because the kitten is too cute and looked a little like Darling's beloved Labi!

On Starting This Blog.......

So, I too have latched onto the bandwagon of blogging, after thinking and thinking about it for a long time. Yesterday at lunch, I published my first posting. I am a very very latecomer but better late than never that is as far as doing something good for yourself.

Why do I want to blog?
Firstly, I am an introvert and introverts more often than not are reserved and shy. I tend to express myself better on paper than verbally. I take pains to write SMS but would rather keep phone conversations short. Definitely I am not much of a conversation maker but I think I am a much  better letter writer. Well, those were the days, who write letters anymore nowadays? So this space is where I express my thoughts and feelings about everything, from the antics of my beloved Mickey, books I find very interesting, my favorite bookshop, my favorite eatery to discussing topics on arthritis, latest good movie or the new shopping mall in town.

Secondly to encourage all my neurons to make new connections as time goes by and therefore keep my mind active. For that matter I chose to blog in English, even though I might be struggling a little with the language. When you blog you will have to think about what to write, and how to write it. You will have to think about grammar and punctuation and whether the writing sounds okay when you read it. For personal reasons, even if it just anecdotes about my daily life, I still hope my postings will be interesting and worth reading.

Thirdly, to keep in touch with friends and family. Since I will be leaving public service soon perhaps this is a better way of communicating with them. Some people used the social media platforms to keep their family and friends updated on their life. I used Facebook mainly to share my photos. Perhaps, I am a bit of a nerd and quite conservative but I honestly detest the slang language and the tons of spelling mistake people make on their Facebook updates. Well, that's me, others may find them cute actually!

How To Avoid Falling Asleep During Lunch During the Fasting Month

I thought I wanted to catch up with some reading this lunch hour. I've got quite a pile of books which are at the various stages of being read, quite a high pile actually. Some I just started reading, some quarter through the books and some tediously halfway through. There are also a pile of very very good books which I have read. Books are amazing really and I just can't live without them. The trouble with me is just that I like to buy books faster than I can read or have the time to read them.

So let me see. What to read?  I got hold of the interesting Asian Geographic Read and look through the section Inspiring Pen to Paper where the author Emily Green was interviewed about her lovely book Something Borrowed. There is also  an excerpt of the book as well. Have seen the movie based on that book, starring the sexy Kate Hudson and the cute Ginnifer Goodwin (of Storybook Once A Upon A Time fame). Forgot the name of the male actors.

Felt sleepy after that reading and turned to You Tube. Hmm.... perhaps I should finish the crime investigation drama that I watched last night. I love crime investigation drama and Above Suspicion is one them. Just thought that Kelly Reilly and Ciaran Hinds gave a superb performance as DC Anna Travis and DCI James Langton.

So how did pass my time the lunch hour today? I read about 20 minutes and I watched You Tube about one hour. I have somehow once again betrayed my pledge as a civil servant to serve with honesty, responsibility and dedication because I have taken up about half an hour extra of my lunch time watching You Tube!