Touching on the subject of polygamy, I just could not ever imagine how I would feel if my dad took a second wife. Regardless of whatever rationale the action was based on. I would feel very betrayed and very angry. My impression of dad would have been severely tarnished. Probably it would have been very tough for me to remain neutral to both my parents. That being said, they must also be, I supposed, polygamous families which are happy and harmonious. Perhaps, I haven't had that much exposure in this subject.
As it turned out, unfortunately, it is two of my brothers, my eldest and the younger brother third in the family, who jumped into the polygamy pool. That, despite my parents strong objection to it. From what I have observed so far, it is quite hard for me to agree with promoting polygamy in order to produce excellent children. In fact it can be the very factor that disintegrate the family. Is it because my brothers are not wealthy? It can't be denied, the burden of managing two or more households would be heavy and stressful. But then even wealthy individuals struggle to maintain family harmony when a man have more than one wives. Let's not name the person, but, remember the well-known businessman who didn't even declare he had a second wife? When he passed away in Long Beach, California in May 2008, the second family was not even acknowledged in the will and had to go through court battles to validate their share of the family fortune. In my opinion, the religious bodies in this country, should have, in the least, voice out their disgust and consternation about the tycoon who did not practise justice and did not properly dispense his duties as the leader of his family. That is if the religious bodies are really trying to uphold justice as prescribed in Islam. They can curse at ladies who wear revealing clothes or individuals who don't pray. Why didn't they intervene in that court battle? Is the syari'ah court powerful with the poor but powerless against multi-millionaires? After all, they can go after khalwat couples, couples being indecent on motorbikes, people not fasting, a lady consuming beer and they even snatch dead bodies. Are those sins very much more heavy than a man who does not dispense justice to his own family? Are we as Muslims, being too preoccupied with rituals and external appearances that we neglect the importance of a good heart, being responsible, being honest and being kind to ourselves, family members and humanity as a whole.
I think some Muslim men will still marry more than one wives, irrespective of whether some state government encourages them or not. If the state government wants to help men marry another wife, then just say so. Please do not give mindless reasons for that, because, honestly, they are very nauseating, especially coming from a lady. Does it mean that monogamous marriages cannot produce excellent children? Is it quantity over quality? Lets produce as many Muslim children as possible, never mind how they turn out. The other important thing is, what are the many implications after a man practises polygamy. What happens if he fails to support of of his families? What happens if he simply divorces one of the wives? He might just gets tired of her and just choose the easy way out. Has happened before definitely. Is the state government unaware that a man can just sms the divorce quote? Encouraging polygamy is one thing but what about the problems that might arise later on. How can women be protected from abuse by unscrupulous men. Can the religious authorities be powerful and make a condition that, for example, if a man is found to be neglecting his duties to one of his family, like not providing for food and shelter, that he can be caught and be imprisoned? Shouldn't a man who neglects his duties be punished?
The general election is looming in the near future. Previously I thought that I just will not go out to vote. What's the point? Such are the state of affairs in Malaysia that I just lose trust in all the political parties. We have a government led by a kleptocrat. We have opposition parties in disarray, forever squabbling among themselves. The economy is down the drain and the country is heavily burdened by debts. We have religious authorities which are arrogant but whose intellectual capacity is embarrassingly very superficial. No, I have changed my mind. When state organs and lawmakers decide on issues like pasted below, without giving proper consideration into the adverse effects, I think must vote. Next polling day, I am going to the polling centre ASAP and I already know which party I am going to vote,
The following 2 articles are taken from The Star.
I do not comment on the second article as it makes me speechless. However, it strengthens my determination to vote in the next GE. This kind of politician, like in the second article, thinks that the rakyat is all so stupid and that whatever absurd opinion they voice out, they will always still be powerful. They also think that being a Malay and a Muslim will always guarantee them protection from being ousted from power.
Friday, 3 February 2017 | MYT 11:22 AM
Read more at http://www.thestar.com.my/news/nation/2017/02/03/come-to-kelantan-if-you-want-to-take-on-more-wives-muslim-men-told/#mCwjw544I1C1QOhV.99
Come To Kelantan If You Want To Take On More Wives, Muslim Men Told
BY SYED AZHAR
KOTA BARU: Muslim men who are planning to take on more wives now have another place to go to when getting married.
Instead of going to several districts in southern Thailand, they can now head over to Kelantan where polygamy for the right reason is encouraged.
State Family Development, Welfare and the People's Wellbeing committee chairman Mumtaz Md Nawi said the state government would help men who wanted to get married, irrespective of whether they were bachelors, or were already married.
"This is to encourage the birth of more Muslim children," she added.
"The Kelantan Government will assist those who intend to have more children by taking second, third or fourth wives," said Mumtaz.
"We will give them comprehensive information and counselling to guarantee that the children from these marriages will turn out to be good Muslims.
"This move is also to discourage such husbands from going to a neighbouring country to marry as that would result in many problems including property divisions and the rights of the other wives," she said.
Mumtaz said this to reporters after attending the 17th Disabled Persons' Day that was launched by Kelantan Mentri Besar Datuk Ahmad Yakob on Thursday.
Mumtaz said the state government wanted to encourage more women to give birth to excellent children.
"It is not for men to take advantage of the policy by taking more wives simply to appease their lust."
She said marriages that were based on lust, and not responsibility, were bound to end up in divorce.
"A responsible husband and father is very important for children to grow up physically and spiritually healthy," she said.
Six years ago, the Kelantan Government created a furore by attempting to give incentives to those who wanted to practise polygamy.
The then senior exco member Wan Ubaidah Omar was reported as saying that the main condition for the incentive, which would include monetary assistance, was for the husbands to inform all the women involved of his marital status and at the same time, make it known to society.
The Star>NationHome > News > Nation Tuesday, 4 April 2017 | MYT 7:41 PM
Read more at http://www.thestar.com.my/news/nation/2017/04/04/tasek-gelugor-mp-not-impossible-for-12-year-old-girls-to-be-married/#OaUZuaIKrd5VXwm0.99
MP: Okay for rapists to marry victims, even some 9-year-olds can marry
BY RAHMAH GHAZALI
KUALA LUMPUR: There is nothing wrong with a rape victim marrying the rapist, according to a Barisan Nasional lawmaker who even suggested that some nine-year-olds were “physically and spiritually” ready for marriage.
Tasek Gelugor MP Datuk Shabudin Yahaya, in trying to refute Dr Siti Mariah Mahmud (Amanah-Kota Raja), said that some 12- and 15-year-old girls looked older than their actual ages.
“When we discuss 12- and 15-year-olds, we don't see their physical bodies because some children aged 12 or 15, their bodies are like 18-year-old women," Shabudin told the Dewan Rakyat on Tuesday.
The former Syariah court judge added that some girls who reached puberty when they were as young as nine years old were “physically and spiritually” ready for marriage.
“So it's not impossible for them to get married,” Shabudin said, adding that there was “nothing wrong” with a rape victim marrying the rapist as it could serve as a “remedy” to the increasing number of social problems.
Shabudin said this when debating the Sexual Offences Against Children Bill 2017 after several Opposition lawmakers suggested amending it to include child marriages as an offence.
He said that although rape is a criminal offence, the rapist and the victim should be “given a second chance to turn a new leaf in life".
“Perhaps through marriage they can lead a healthier, better life. And the person who was raped does not necessarily have a bleak future. She will have a husband, at least, and this could serve as a remedy to growing social problems,” he said.
Dr Siti Mariah, however, argued that allowing the rapist to marry the victim would not guarantee a better life.
“I don’t agree with marrying off the victim to the rapist. If the rapist repents, maybe that’s fine, but what if the husband is ‘haprak’ (useless)?” she said.
Teo Nie Ching (DAP-Kulai) cited two cases of the victims marrying the attackers, and argued that the marriages ended up becoming more problematic, causing more hurt.
She said that one of the cases involved a 35-year-old man in Negri Sembilan who married a 14-year-old with a disability after allegedly raping her. The man then reportedly raped his 11-year-old sister-in-law and forced his wife to film him committing the act.
Citing his experience as a judge, Shabudin, however, said that Teo should not generalise the issue as there have been many cases where such marriages did not end in divorce.
“The girl becomes safer when she is married rather than when she is left alone. Don’t assume they (rapists) remain bad people,” he said.
Teo's motion to amend the Sexual Offences Against Children Bill to include child marriages as an offence was ultimately defeated by a voice vote.
TAGS / KEYWORDS:
Sexual Offences against Children Bill 2017 , Tasek Gelugor MP , Datuk Shabudin Yahaya , child marriage , Dewan Rakyat , Parliament , 12 year old
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