What is my bliss? Where is my bliss?

First and foremost, what is bliss? While we have all heard the term “follow your bliss,” a phrase that can be heard constantly today, many of us aren’t quite sure what it really means. And why is it we have to find and follow our bliss?

The dictionary gives the meaning of bliss as perfect happiness, supreme happiness. It is joy, pleasure, delight, happiness, gladness, ecstasy, elation, rupture, euphoria, heaven, paradise, seventh heaven, cloud nine, fulfilled, utopia, Eden, Arcadia, halcyon days, sense of purpose, top of the world, oblivious of everything else, 

While bliss may sound like a mood or a state of happiness,  some people say it’s everything but that. Really? It is believed that trying to force bliss can cause a strain and an insincere state of mind. When someone around us is pretending to be happy, it’s very clear that it’s forced. Rather than being an attitude, it’s something that becomes a fundamental part of our nature. 

Our life has become so economic and practical, I would say even frantic, in its orientation that, as you get older, the claims of the moment upon you are so great, you hardly know where the hell you are, or what it is you really want to do. You are always doing something that is required of you, expected of you, what peers, parents, society deemed you should do. What and where then here is your bliss? You have to find it yourself.

The majority’s function in relation to the spirit is to try to listen and to open up to someone who’s had an experience beyond that of food, shelter, progeny, and wealth.

We are having experiences all the time which may on occasion render some sense of this, a little intuition of where your bliss is. Grab it. No one can tell you what it is going to be. You have to learn to recognize your own depth.

In a sentiment that calls to mind Mark Strand’s beautiful meditation on the poet’s task of bearing witness to the universe, Campbell points to poets as the most attentive of listeners to the language of bliss:

Poets are simply those who have made a profession and a lifestyle of being in touch with their bliss. Most people are concerned with other things. They get themselves involved in economic and political activities, or get drafted into a war that isn’t the one they’re interested in, and it may be difficult to hold to this umbilical under those circumstances. That is a technique each one has to work out for himself somehow.

Bliss may be defined as a natural direction you can take as a way to maximize your sense of joy, fulfillment, and purpose. Sometimes people equate bliss with being in a state of euphoria, but in reality, being blissful is the state you’re in when you’re doing what brings you a deep sense of joy. When you’re in a blissful state, you’re listening to the voice of your heart.

The famous writer Joseph Campbell was one of the pioneers in the discussion of bliss, suggesting that people “find their bliss.” He said, “The way to find out what makes you the happiest is to focus on being mindful of your happiest moments—not simply excited, not just thrilled, but deeply happy.” In essence, this requires paying attention to yourself, and being mindful of the sensations in your body and the thoughts fluttering around in your mind. It also involves engaging in a bit of self-analysis.

More often than not, we tend to engage in the art of complaining, but if we focused more energy on thinking positively and looking at all the good in our lives, we would be happier and more blissful. Feelings and experiences of gratitude and honoring all the wonderful lived experiences that make us feel good about ourselves, our loved ones, and our lives is important to achieving a state of bliss. An essential part of acknowledging these feelings is to chronicle or document them—not just during tumultuous times, but also during happy ones. This process can serve as a guidepost or framework for us to refer to. Bathing in our joy brings about feelings of bliss, and it can also affect those we come in contact with, offering a positive shift in perspective.

If you engage in activities that make you happy, then you can move in the direction of your full potential or self-actualization. These are markers, or life-enhancing moments, that you can keep track of in your journal. Most of us strive toward self-actualization, intuitively knowing that it is the deepest place of satisfaction and bliss. Maslow identified peak experiences or life-changing moments that could result in an individual moving in the direction of bliss. He believed that people who are highly evolved, such as mystics, are those who’ve experienced these peak moments, which can result in bliss.

To achieve and maintain a state of bliss, it’s important to be open-minded and to be a risk-taker—walking the road less traveled. Think about those who exude bliss, and examine their lives to see what traits they possess. An example of someone who took a risk that paid off was the main character in the book The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. The protagonist is a pilot stranded on a desert with a nonfunctioning airplane. A man who calls himself a prince appears from another planet,.

He suggests that the pilot go with him to the desert to find water. Initially, the pilot declines, thinking it’s safer to stay with his aircraft. Against what he considers his best judgment, the pilot decides to accompany the prince in the search for water. Just about the time when the pilot thinks he made a wrong decision, both men come upon a well with water. Had the pilot not trusted the prince, or had he not taken the risk to venture on this new path, he would probably still be stuck in the desert with a broken-down plane. The moral of the story is that in order to find your bliss, you need to be a risk-taker.

How can we find our bliss so that we may follow it?

1. Listen: Allow yourself to truly listen to that inner voice. Pay attention when your heart fills up with happiness about a new door opening. Don’t let those moments get away and go unnoticed. That’s how you follow your bliss.

2. Share: Part of following your bliss means sharing it with those that you trust and love. Never fear to express your passions and dreams with others. By sharing these feelings, we are accepting them fully.

3. Be Open: If a new opportunity crosses your path, try not to judge it too quickly or too harshly. Be open to new ideas and experiences, maybe even things you hadn’t considered before.

4. Be Curious.

If there’s something people enjoy but you can’t imagine why, investigate. Perhaps it’s ballroom dancing, poetry, martial arts, aviation, improv, The Peace Corps. Whatever it is, there may be more to learn in the doing than the observing. There’s often much more than meets the eye. Some things need to be experienced to be appreciated.

5. Be willing.

Give it some time. (I recommend a minimum of two hours!) It helps to get good enough at a new endeavor to appreciate the joy it may bring you once you get the hang of it. Also, be willing to let go of an identity you may have outgrown. I was sure I was not the “physical type.” I hated exercise. I certainly didn’t believe I would or could be able to master something as outrageous as a headstand.

6. Be proactive.

Develop a mindset that is focused on finding and following your bliss. This means allowing time and energy to explore different things. Be willing to step outside your comfort zone. At least a little bit.  Actions speak louder than words. We’ve all heard it before but it really couldn’t be more true. Take those steps, even just one to really follow your heart and live with intention. Question yourself constantly.

7. Be surprised.

You might be amazed at how much you enjoy something you never expected to.

8. Trust Life.

If you find yourself in a situation that isn’t exactly what you had in mind, pay attention. You might be at the beginning of the very path to the bliss you’ve been seeking. To paraphrase John Lennon: “Bliss may be what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”

Myths About Following Your Bliss

Joseph Campbell has left us all with one seriously useful secret. Following our bliss is not all that complicated, provided we learn how to really do it. But unfortunately, there are many false myths out there that make it seem much more unnecessarily complicated. 

Too Risky: Many people for some reason are convinced that following their bliss is too risky. This couldn’t be farther from the truth. There is nothing risky about following your heart, listening to your gut, and doing what you are most passionate about. What do you really have to lose? What’s really risky at the end of the day is doing something that doesn’t make you happy.

It Means Quitting Your Job: This is another seriously false myth! Perhaps following your bliss does mean you should quit your job — but it’s surely not something that always must be. It depends on what your job is and how you feel about it. Many people get confused and think that they have to quit their job in order to find their bliss. Whether or not you love your job, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s your bliss. You can be in a job that you don’t absolutely love and still find your bliss elsewhere.

Bliss Means Only Doing Things That Make You Happy: Life is great when you’re doing only the specific things that make you happy. But that’s not always realistic, and that’s not what bliss truly means. You can be doing certain things that help you find your bliss, while there may be some things in your life that you wish weren’t there. Perhaps you love your partner and your children, and they are your bliss, but you still struggle with your career. Your family can be your bliss while your work situation is not ideal.

Instant Success Will Follow: This is also unfortunately a myth when it comes to following your bliss. Finding your bliss is a process that never truly ends. Following your bliss means trusting that everything will work out, even if things aren’t completely perfect. Success will come at some point, but not necessarily right away, and you can still find your bliss before that point.

You Only Have One Bliss: It’s very easy to convince ourselves that we have only one bliss and once we find that, everything will come together. But this is false! There are endless things in this world that can help you to follow your bliss, including anything from obtaining a degree to painting a picture.If you have yet to find your bliss, fear not! You will find it when the time is right and when the right thing comes your way. And now that you are an expert on following your bliss, you should have no problem getting there.

Inspirations for finding your bliss

If you are looking for some inspiration as you aspire to follow your bliss, whatever that may mean for you, look no further than these powerful and wise quotes by the legendary John Campbell — the father of following our bliss.

‘‘If you can’t see your path laid out for you step by step, you know it’s not your path. Your own path you make with every step you take. That’s why it’s your path.’’

‘‘A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself.’’

‘‘You must give up the life you planned in order to have the life that is waiting for you.’’

‘‘Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.’’

‘‘The goal of life is to make your heartbeat make the beat of the universe, to match your nature with Nature.’’

“There is no need for us all to be alike and think the same way, neither do we need a common enemy to force us to come together and reach out to each other. If we allow ourselves and everyone else the freedom to fully individuate as spiritual beings in human form, there will be no need for us to be forced by worldly circumstances to take hands and stand together. Our souls will automatically want to flock together, like moths to the flame of our shared Divinity, yet each with wings covered in the glimmering colors and unique patterns of our individual human expression.”

― this last quote is by Anthon St. Maarten