When I heard about a series of dreadful misfortunes that fell on an acquaintance, I felt very sad. It reminds me of a time when my life was a roller coaster of trials and tribulations and my emotions went haywire and I walked around like a zombie. I hope he will have the tenacity, strength and wisdom to get back on his feet.
When you have been through a lot in life, there is a tendency for you to see only the negative and the miseries that you have encountered. When you are betrayed many times you began to distrust people and you feel that nobody is ever truthful and can ever be your good friend. When my adopted mum marriages failed more than once, I just couldn't help feeling that most husbands and wives fell out of love after some time and most marriages are in fact doomed in the end. The feeling intensified when some of my relationships also ended in betrayals.
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The Serenity Prayer
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Things are very much better nowadays, thank you very, very much my Lord. I am neither rich nor do I have a very well paid job, or very well travelled, or very beautiful or have the highest level of paper qualifications, or whatever it is that is considered synonym with being successful in our materialistic society nowadays, blah....blah.....blah. The most important thing is I am okay and I feel okay. I love myself and I am determined to take good care of myself and to be as independent as possible and to grow and enrich my mental capacity. All I asked from you my Lord is to give a little nudge, a little drive for me to start changing or adapting whenever and wherever I needed to.
For today l am just thankful for what I am, for being me, for the family that I have, for all my caring friends, for my my delightful nephews and nieces, for my ordinary and sometimes monotonous life, for the job that I have all these while, for the health bestowed by God that at times I take for granted and especially for whatever little strength that the Lord granted me that enabled me to journey through the difficult part of my life and still emerged generally unscathed. I understand now that those perilous periods were very important lessons in raising the person that I am today, good or bad. As to whether the outcome of the lessons were positive or otherwise was entirely a matter of my choice and I accepted the responsibility of my life. It does not mean my life is perfect, far from it, but I am okay with the imperfections.
Thank you Darling, Dear, Bonda, Siti Z and all my other friends too, for being my friends, for being you, for accepting me when I'm fun (and gorgeous too?) but also when l'm perhaps a little cranky and not-so-fun to be with (I just hope the not-so-fun time is very very seldom he....he......he). Thank you so very much to my old friend BK who always makes effort to keep in contact with me and is always concerned about my well being, may God bless you and your family always. Even if the friendship is limited to sms and the very infrequent calls I deeply appreciate it.
